The Problem With Small Groups

A friend reached out recently regarding some struggles their church was having with their small groups. Specifically, although their church was mature and well developed, their small group ministry wasn’t flourishing.

I think anyone who has been around the ministry block a time or two has experienced this. And I’m nearly ready to say that the older the ministry (both the members and the congregation itself) is, the less enthusiastic it is about small groups. Although many congregants may have warm memories of deep, life changing small groups they were a part of as young adults and students, the longer its been since those memories, the less drive there is to open up to and invest in a completely new group of strangers.

So what do we do?

Well it’s never a bad idea to start by asking the question, “Why?” Why do we have small groups? Is it simply because that’s what good churches do? Is it because our members want to recreate those warm memories? Is it because we want our members to feel connected, and small groups seem to be the only thing churches can do to help with that?

Whatever the reason, allow me to press here a bit. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to give people chances to connect, or to experience again those moments of spiritual depth and transformation they found in small groups past. But remember that our time here on Earth is short. Do we really want to spend our best efforts on trying to recreate experiences, especially when there’s little guarantee that we’ll be able to do so?

I think Jesus calls us into community with others for something more than this.

I’ve been listening to this great podcast called When Church Stops Working featuring a professor at Luther Seminary named Andrew Root and one of the ideas Root discusses is this thought that the greatest thing the church can offer people isn’t great programing or even stellar preaching, but the chance to hear and tell stories. Specifically, stories that help us understand who we are both individually and as communities, and who we are in the Story of God.

With that in mind, what if we as church leaders let go of small groups? Allow existing ones to continue, sure, but let go of trying get every new member into one, and instead use the time and energy that that frees up to start creating spaces for story. Perhaps this looks like youth groups both inviting older members to share their stories, and youth sharing their stories with each other and the rest of the church. Perhaps this looks like the church providing toddler and infant care while young parents get together to share the madness and loneliness of village-less parenting.

Perhaps this looks like…nothing…for now. But waiting and listening as leaders, hopeful and expectant that God will show up when the time is right.